Pop Out - Aight. We startin'. This shit soundin' like badly mixed Danny Brown right off. Damn, the hell is this junk? Okayyyyyy.....son ain't rappin' anymore. He makin' noisecore at this point. Aight, word is bond y'all, this sucka been absent ALL OF FRCIKIN' COVID, n' he STILL ain't learned how to rap proper!! This shit be soundin' they threw a tape in the meat grinder or some typa shit. If the whole album gonna be like this, n this shit over n' hour, I'mma be typin' in all funny letters by the end LiKe DiS cause I'mma lose my marbles, ON ME!! Damn, that shit over. Terrible shit.
Beats - 3/10
Lyrics - 3/10
6/20
Crush - Aight. This startin' out on the production side. Son ain''t doin' much than jus' sayin' "Shawty gonna let me crush it" ova n' ova again. This beat ain't BAD perse, but it's lackin' that shit that makes a beat HIT, ya feel me? It's like they done took all the BOUNCe outta that shit, nahmean? Anyhow, the song ain't nothin' much. Son talkin' 'bout how he 2milli for a feature n' whatnot. Nuthin' you missin' out on here, word.
Beats - 5/10
Lyrics - 5/10
10/20
K Pop - A title like this already a red flag. Hm. But yo, the beat soundin' a lil' bit heat. The raps is lame ol' Carti raps, son talkin' shit like "I found Jesus, Christian Dior". This soundin' like Yeat if he got some spine to him. This ain't rappin', shit's noisecore. I can appreciate whateva they did wit' the sample here, but it ain't interestin'. Lotta talk sayin' nuthin', WORD.
Beats - 5/10
Lyrics - 5/10
10/20
Evil Jordan - Now this the first beat that kinda be soundin' like they forgot to throw it in a log chopper, nahmean? Shit's clean. The lyrics here sound like son scared to rap, like he hidin' in the corner whimperin' 'bout the monster that's comin' down the hallway to eat him for dinner. There's a coupla bars in here, but nuthin' interestin'. Like, yo son, there ain't nuthin' here that I can't be gettin' from a better rapper someplace, namsayin'? Anyhow, this the best track on the album so far.
Beats - 6/10
Lyrics - 5/10
11/20
Mojo Jojo - This better not be a Jojo's Bizarre Adventure reference son. If it is, I'mma grab this telephone pole n' pitch that shit through ya wall so hard you gonna be sayin' "Ayo, how'd this telephone get in my dinin' room n shit b?". Oh my gosh, it's Kendrick Fuckin' Lamar!!
Well that shit was disappointin'. The production so damn bad we barely hear jack, n' son only let Kendrick ad-lib. Wow, til' now, I didn't know that ANY brotha could waste a Kendrick feature. This why you don't believe the hype, it usually a whole lotta bullshit. Unless I ain't seein' sumthin', this yet anotha damn borin' track son be puttin' on his album. Next.
Beats - 5/10
Lyrics - 5/10 (Nah, we ain't awardin' you ad-lib points cause you shanghaied Kendrick, get out)
10/20
Philly - Oh, this Travis Scott on here now soundin' like he tryna sing love ballads or summa that typa shit. We got this dumbass line from Carti: "She got face card so she got balance". Word son??? You STILL ain't learned how to rap? Damn. Aight, movin' on.
Beats - 6/10
Lyrics - 6/10
12/20
Radar - Oh. Metro producin' this shit. Son shoulda come in n' produced the whole dang album. We got this wack ass set of bars:
"Whole lot of bitches suck dick
Whole lot of bitch suck dick
Whole lot of bitches get dick
Whole lot of bitches hold dick"
Poetry incarnate, amirite y'all?!!?!?! Nah, jus' messin' wit' ya. Next up gonna be the song where Carti rhymes "One fish, two fish, new fish, blue fish".
Beats - 7/10
Lyrics - 5/10
12/20
Rather Lie - Aight. You KNOW the rap album bad when you actually happy to hear from The Weeknd when you been hopin' for hardcore raps kickin' knowledge n shit. This shit jus' a whole buncha mess 'bout how he grabbin' up all the girls n' the cougars too. Wack.
Beats - 6/10
Lyrics - 5/10
11/20
Fine Shit - This song ain't livin' up to the title. the only thing kinda interestin', an' no, I ain't gonna use the word "Fine" is the beat. Whole song jus' kinda like "Rather Lie" continued. Skip.
Beats - 6/10
Lyrics - 6/10
12/20
Backdoor - The way son be pronouncin' "Backdoor" sound like he got plasy of the tounge or sumthin', nahmean? Oh, Kenny's back. Word. He kinda doin' the same typa bars he was kickin' on "Love", you know, that track off "DAMN" back in 2017. It's aight, but word, I'm still gonna be sayin' this a waste of a good feature. Carti growlin' an' snarlin' all ova the track like he a scalded cat jus' ruinin' this shit.
Beats - 6/10
Lyrics - 6/10
12/20
Toxic - Aight, this track got Skepta on it. I been followin' Skepta for the past coupla years n son can rap HARD when he puts his mind to that shit. Let's see if he comin' wit' the fire here.
This hook here wack, n' Carti as usual don't got jack to talk 'bout. Skepta's verse is aight, he still comin' wit' nice rhymes. So far, that's gonna be my favourite verse on this whole damn slog of an album, WORD.
Beats - 6/10
Lyrics - 7/10
13/20
Munyun - This anotha one of them noisecore typa songs, n' a coupla evil laugh effects here n there so that son sounds EDGY. Cause ya know, that's the point of hiphop, BEING EDGYYYYY. Sorry 'bout that fam, I'm jus' in my sarcasm bag today, n' I ain't in the mood for NONE of this nonsense Carti be pushin'. Word.
Beats - 6/10
Lyrics - 5/10
11/20
Crank - Aight, Carti fully back makin' noisecore. We jus' here rappin' bout opps n' bitches, that's all this brotha be knowin' how to rap 'bout, word. We got a whole buncha junk here, it ain't worth repeatin'. Son soundin' like a bad parody of hisself at this point.
Beats - 5/10
Lyrics - 4/10
9/20
Charge Dem Hoes - Future on the intro here n' he got the most chopped n' screwed typa mess, DAMN. I'm kinda ashamed sayin' this, but Travis Scott's uninterestin' verse the best part of this whole damn album. Aight, movin' on after we rate this:
Beats - 4/10
Lyrics - 6/10
10/20
Good Credit - The intro sample here's kinda aight. We got this bar that kinda seem like a shot at Drake - "He want my swag, I got the whole world on sixes, you too late".
Aight. Kendrick Lamar came back - son jus' killed the whole damn song. FINALLY, we FINALLY got sumthin' serious from somebody who wasn't named Skepta up in this joint. Kendrick's verse ain't nuthin' too mind-blowin, but he on point, jus' like he said, n' son killed that trash beat. Finally.
Beats - 6/10
Lyrics - 8/10
14/20
I Seeeeee You Baby Boi - Word is bond y'all, take a good look at that shit. That gotta be the worst title EVER for any song y'all. This shit pathetic too, it soundin' like Kidz Bop bein' played on a shortwave radio station that got too much static. This a whole track 'bout how some chick's lied to son but he still wanna smash. Whole beat soundin' like they use the same ol' samples. Skip.
Beats - 5/10
Lyrics - 5/10
10/20
Wake Up F1lthy - Travis doin' his croonin' cowboy impression, or whateva that shit is on here. But yeah, Carti's verse ain't even memorable. The beat sound like noisecore bein' repeated ova n' ova again. It just a loop of too much distortion, a whole buncha noise omelette, that's what they be makin' up in here.
Beats - 5/10
Lyrics - 5/10
10/20
Jumpin - Ayo. This track featurin' Lil Uzi Vert. Didn't know this shit could get worse, but aight, here we are b. We got this whole wack verse from him that don't even make no sense lyrically endin' wit' "I am becomin' a narcissist". Oh word son?! Ya be thinkin' we can't tell that shit? Geesh, damn.
Beats - 6/10
Lyrics - 5/10
11/20
Trim - Future actually up in here tryna rap on his feature verse. Good. We be needin' this typa mess for awhile from son now. His verse was aight. We've got this corny-ass bar from Carti "She throw me cat, I pull a bag on the ho". It's an aight song, the first track where I actually kinda vibe wit' it. Future killin' this shit, word.
Beats - 7/10
Lyrics - 6/10
13/20
Cocaine Nose - Oh my gosh. Carti soundin' like he think this is death metal or sumthin'. Son shoulda gone into that instead of rap. Then he coulda sounded all weird n' we wouldn't be mindin' son. Aight, at one minute, I'm jus' gonna be skippin' this track, it's ear rape.
Beats - 3/10
Lyrics - 3/10
6/20
We Need All Da Vibes - Wow, son got Young Thug, Ty Dolla $ign up in here, n' they soundin' good. I coulda lived wit' this radio-friendly typa shit, not gonna be vibin' it, too soft for me, word, but I ain't gonna be trashin' it either. Carti gettin' owned on his OWN DAMN SONG!! Y'all gotta listen to this, the mixin' here ain't worth jack shit, n' son sound like a lil' joke they put at the end. Damn, does son's producer hate him or sumthin'?! This shit got me crackin' up fam, WORD!!
Beats - 7/10
Lyrics - 7/10
14/20
Olympian - Right off the bat we gettin' this bar "Michael Jackson, beat it, b!" That Mike Jack rhyme overused as hell son. The fuck was you thinkin' 'bout?! Son soundin' like he Taylor Swift on this. I didn't know it was possible for a man to be soundin' like a chick sangin', but yo, Carti jus' done gone n' proved this lil' black boy WRONG! This whole thing trash, skip.
Beats - 4/10
Lyrics - 3/10
7/20
OPM Babi - This title a tribute to son's label "Opium". Aight, let's see. Oh, more noisecore, dang it, dang it, DANG IT. The beat here even worse than the last beat. N then we got all these bars soundin' like son havin' an asthma attack, NOT rappin'. Miss me wit' that son, you need a respirator or summa that typa medical shit???
Beats - 3/10
Lyrics - 4/10
7/20
Twin Trim - This beat soundin' aight. Oh damnnnnnnn. This shit sound like it was written by a fuckin' middle schooler y'all!! Who the fuck told son it sounded dope sangin' this pots n pans sing-songy GARBAGE?! This brotha for rela right now, b?! The fuck they thinkin' even INCLUDIN' this wack ass shit?! Skip!
Beats - 7/10
Lyrics - 2/10
9/20
Like Weezy - Aside from the fact he only like post-Tha Carter III Weezy, we gonna address this "poppin' that boy like "Pop"" bar. Shit's uncreative son. This like pickin' up a dictionary n' looking for "ballet". Then you find sumthin' like "The practice of ballet". This shit where rappers be definin' slang by the slang gotta stop, ON ME.
Beats - 5/10
Lyrics - 5/10
10/20
Dis 1 Got It - Carti starts off sayin' "Mollys, Perkys, I feel so invincible". Nah, you jus' high. Son must've been high writin' this song cause he ain't got nuthin' to talk 'bout. He jus' doin' a whole buncha random bars here n' there. The wya they be mixin' the sample into the beat here, that shit jus' got me thinkin' the DJ sum typa broke loser who don't know tune if it slapped him silly an' shouted its name.
Beats - 4/10
Lyrics - 4/10
8/20
Walk - The fuckin' beat sounds like a brass band fallin' down the stairs. Like seriously yo, YOU CAN'T THINK UP BETTER SHIT??! The way son was flowin, it was aight, it was aight, but the rhymes, AYO, the rhymes was trash b! What y'all smokin?! Gimme the name cause I wanna make sure I AVOID that shit, word!!!
Beats - 3/10
Lyrics - 5/10
8/20
HBA - Damn, this shit annoyin, he sayin' he laugh like a HYYY-eee-NAH! when he gets a body. Well right now he soundin' like a hyena rappin'. We got this bar "I go Ray Charles, I cannot see her". Lame.
Beats - 6/10
Lyrics - 5/10
11/20
Overly - This track be soundin' like son's on drugs again while writin'. Cause he jus' be repeatin' the same typa shit ova n' ova again. Damn, so fuckin' glad this the last track fam, cause I'mma boutta fall asleep here, word. The hook makes me wanna hit son in the face witta frying pan.
Beats - 6/10
Lyrics - 5/10
11/20
South Atlanta Baby - The sample here all messed up, but the production style kinda interestin'. The beat still wack. The guy on the intro, I think his name is DJ Swamp Izzo or some typa shit like that. He sayin': "Carti, I ain't gonna lie, my nigga, this music right here put you in a whole 'nother category". Yeah, he ain't lyin', new category - Noisecore Trash Rap. Damn, this outro left me feelin' like I just came off a bad LSD trip, word. Shit got me trippin' n wantin' to commit war crimes on whoever mixed this shit n' told son it was dope. Damn, fuck this tape.
Beats - 5/10
Lyrics - 6/10
11/20
That shit was terrible. Let's rate it:
309/600
52%
Damn that shit was awful. That shit's a whole hour n a half of my life that I ain't never gettin' back. Aight, best verse gonna have to go 1. Kendrick Lamar, 2. Skepta, 3. Future. I was kinda shocked, but word is bond y'all, Future came outta the gate swingin'. That verse dropped on one of them tracks back there, that shit dope for real. Kendrick still on that demon time, playin' Hiphop Prophet n' all that, n' Skepta still comin' wit' the rhymes, so that's all good. But word is bond y'all, this tape TRASH. All them features can't save this shit. Oh damn. Aight, check this shit out y'all. I jus' logged onto Reddit to check on things, n' see how the people be feelin' 'bout this album. First post I see "Playboy Carti fans are just pretending to enjoy his music to fit in with all the other people pretending to enjoy his music". This shit goin' double cardboard y'all. The beats is wack, his rhymes is wack. Sometimes I ain't too convinced son's sanity is all there, like I don't mean he wildin' out, I mean he wanderin' 'round his mansion or whateva the fuck kinda crib he got goin like "Where the hell am I b, where the bitches, b???? Ugghhfhghgfhsadfvsgre". Like I mean Playboy Carti the typa guy to be caught in his nightgown high as fuck eatin' grass n' tryna figure out where the hell he is. Aight, I'm out. This tape a real disaster, y'all ain't missin' nothin' by not coppin' this shit.
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