We gots this fresh drop from Yeat calin' itself "Lyfestyle". Now I ain't feelin' Yeat too much, namsayin'? If y'all recollect me, the king listened to this boy back in like...August I think, wit' son's 2093 tape. Word is bond son, that shit was straight up Fortnite lobby music, ya feel me? That was some soft sucka mess for prepubescent gamers n' folk like that. Tape sounded like sci-fi on softness n' synths n't autotune. That ish was straight up boring yo, lyrical NyQuil all ova the joint. But we gonna give son a second chance, b, cause the King jus' be wantin' ta make sure son ain't just got a whole buncha L's in his alphabet soup, ya feel me? Aight! We goin' in now fam':
Geek Time -
Ayo, I kinda vibin' wit' the beat startin' out, for real tho'. Hmmmm, mah, now I ain't no more. It kinda feelin' mad scattered, like they got a buncha stuff all ova the place, nahmean? Ayo, I ain't gettin' down wit' this one bit now - Yeat's voice be soundin' like son's gettin' a real bad asthma attack while tryna rap through that autotune mess. This joint soundin' terribly mixed up, b. Then this DJ gone n' tossed in some sample that keeps interruptin'. Ayo, WILL THAT THING SHUT UP? Nah, it ain't. Huh. Seems like son thought his joint was such pure heat, he gotta sing the whole thing ova again??? Eh, no! Miss me wit' alla that garbage, b.
Beats - 5/10
Lyrics - 4/10
9/20
STFU -
Not gonna lie, I vibes heavy wit' whateva indie rock song son's DJ sampled on the intro. But keepin' it a whole hunna wit' y'all the otha way, Yeat's voice on this autotune thingy gonna have me wildin' out for real. Son soundin' like he got WORSE since July. We got him spittin' corny bars for y'all's cringe factors like this thing yo:
"Grinding your fucking gears up like rail
Blind to your fucking brokе shit like braille"
I ain't gonna keep dissin' this, jus' gonna say everything I said 'bout that first joint, y'all can think it 'bout THIS ONE TOO. Seems like son jus' recycled that first joint's beat anyways y'all.
Beats - 5/10
Lyrics - 5/10
10/20
They Tell Me -
Ayo, gonna make a guess y'all, n' say this guy gonna use the same kinda beat for EVERY DANG SONG. This line here "Always impaired, I don't like sunglasses, why you staring?" got me kinda confused. I dunno if son jus' doin' dorky bars for the heck of it, or if he was tryna do some lame attempt at a pun, b. Son musta got a lil' help on this one y'all, cause the boy's lyrics done sharpened up a bit. There's some cleverness kinda like here n' there. Not no real brainiac stuff, jus' like...stuff showin' son's still breathin'.
Beats - 5/10
Lyrics - 6/10
11/20
Heard of Me -
Same dang typa track like the otha two b!! Son, is ya DJ a robot? Cause he sure got the creativity of one. An' I ain't talkin' no kinda hi-class AI, ChatGPT empowered typa robot either, I'm talkin' 'bout them robots that be carryin' ya plates in summa them new school restaurants. This beat soundin' like it was made by one of them things, b. Yeat betta double check he ain't got Mr. Data or one of them robots workin' on the turntables an' he jus' THINK it's a flesh n' blood DJ, nahmean.
Gotta move on from that mid beat, cause yo, we got lines like this "Maybe I'm just too real for all this shit, you know I bleed that; this got them scratching they heads like I keyed it". Yay. Lame pun. You damn right we be scratchin' heads son, we be scratchin' heads cause we ain't even be KNOWIN' how you done gone attained such levels of wackness, b. I ain't even gonna try n' figure out what this song supposed to be fam. Word, this joint kinda feelin' like son wrote the whole track outta bras he didn't like too much in "They Tell Me". All the corn son threw outta that track wound up here par.
Beats - 5/10
Lyrics - 4/10
9/20
Speedball -
We still tied up on this carosel of every dang song soundin' like Yeat jus' doin' the same thing ova n' ova. Ya boy done finished up gettin' mad at son for now, aight? I done finished mournin' this album, n' I'mma accept everything here gonna sound the same. An' I'm gonna have to also accept son's life done been so borin', he ain't got shit to rap 'bout but being rich n' punchin' people. Word.
Ayo, we got this wackass bar "Pull up in a Tonka, put them lights on 'em". Oh word?? You pullin' up in a Tonka, huh son? That 'cause you toy or what? At least this bassline got a lil' kick to it.
Beats - 6/10
Lyrics - 5/10
11/20
U Don't Know Lyfe -
Ain't gonna lie, this intro soundin' weak as hell. Son's croonin' all ova the beat wit' that cheesy autotune. Yeat's vocal effects is kinda like this, b. Pay 'tention, I'mma take y'all kiddies on this blog to school, namsayin'?
Yeat's vocal effects ain't nuthin' I'm vibin' wit' son. This vocal effect mess is kinda like ya got this punpkin pie. Ya gotcha pumpkins in there, you gotcha sugar, ya gotcha crust, eggs I guess, whateva y'all be puttin' in normal pies nowadays. Then, Yeat gets a holda that pie 'n son says "No, this pie gonna make me have a heehaw, buddy. Let's puddle jump this one homie". Then son puts on one of them wackass balaclavas he be livin' in on, an' goes an' pours a whole buncha liquid corn syrup on there. Then son says "Aight, it's all ya's buddy! Sweeter than ever!" Disgustin'. That the typa mess son done gone n' done to his voice - oversaturated it till it's mad wack.
I'mma be real for one sec wit' y'all - Yeat musta got bullied at school ova his voice. This the typa thing low self-esteem havin' kids be doin' to their voices afta gettin' bullied n' shit.
Also, son keeps shoutin' "Cunt" like he's five n' just learned that word. I ain't jokin' either. Jus' play the record, son kinda put some FORCE into that word y'all. Aight, we gets it, ya love yellin' "Cunt", miss me wit' that, aight??
Beats - 6/10
Lyrics - 3/10
9/20
Orchestrate -
Oh, this kinda got a bit of soul to it y'all! Meanin' it don't be soundin' like every otha beat son done had. Son rappin' more of what I call "lil' boy stuff" - the chicks he's smashin', the money he's wastin', n' the fancy cars he gonna crash one of these fine days.
Seriously, does son have anythin' else goin' on in life he wanna tell us 'bout?! In EVERY SINGLE SONG, son's comin' off like this spoiled rich suburban kid who ain't got JACK SHIT happenin' in life, ain't got no job, ain't got no girlfriend that lasts longer than one night. He jus' wanna brag 'bout how he got rich, n' the only reason son got rich is cause some uncle or aunty of his done kicked the bucket an' willed son everythin'. Son's mad immature yo.
The autotune makin' this wackness wacker gonna hafta go wit'out sayin'. Skip.
Beats - 6/10
Lyrics - 4/10
10/20
Be Quiet ft. Kodak Black -
No offense to Kodak, but afta you dropped that wackness of an album son, I'm gettin' hives seein' you's a feature up in here.
Aight, we playin' it. This beat soundin' like the "Orchestrate" beat, jus' kinda recycled. The whole dang track, jus' McDonald's junk food, b. This track a Wackness Burger wit' summa them Wackness Fries, then washed down wit' Loser Shakes, namsayin'? Whole thing's gotta be a minefield of corny bars. Kodak rapped so bad he made Yeat look interestin'. Yea, Yeat, the kid who's got the personality of a carton of eggs. Kodak spit the wackest bar in this whole wack sandwich y'all:
"So fly, thought I could fly
Got so high, I'm tryna fly
Don't know why, must have thought I was a vulture"
Ayo, we know you ain't got the brains to do too much, so maybe you is some kinda vulture, b. But on some real talk tho' Kodak...get ya wack self outta here befo' I start puttin' hands on y'all for makin' this!! Serious, what y'all smokin'??!!
Beats - 6/10
Lyrics - 3/10
9/10
The Costes -
This track title son apparently got from sum fancy hotel joint up in Paris or sumthin'. The song ain't 'bout the hotel.
Beat's jus' more of that recycled mess wit' summa that horribly screechy excuse for samplin'. Son's lyrics is jus' uninterestin'. Nothin' bad this time yo, jus' meh. Oh, but this hook tho'....Makin' a 5 Percenters reference when I KNOW you ain't down wit' the I Self Lord And Master clique is STUPID. Wash ya mouth out, b.
Beats - 5/10
Lyrics - 4/10
9/20
Go2Work ft. Summrs -
We startin' off wit' anotha small pointless skit. I guess some noise was needed. AYO, this Summrs kid gotta have one of the wimpiest voices I done heard in rap. Son up in here soundin' like Yeat's crew done gone n' hired summa them pink bunnies to come an' rap wit' Yeat. Lest y'all be thinkin' the king ain't thorough, I watched that music video for this, an' the video got me thinkin' son recorded it on a Kodak brownie box camera in Mom's basement. Or his neckbeard nest. Take ya pick.
Beats - 5/10
LYrics - 3/10
8/20
Gone 4 A Min -
This a really borin' shrilly soundin' kinda song. He's rappin' about drug addiction but in the least interestin' way. The way these wack rappers be rhymin' "bitch" ova an' ova is ANNOYIN', ON ME! We got this corny line "I don't meet in the middle, don't do no borderline. I'm a geekster, baby, I do this all the time". You mad stupid for this one, b.
Beats - 5/10
Lyrics - 3/10
8/20
Forever Again -
This title be soundin' like a Disney kids show promo. The beat's.....terrible. This beat here be soundin' like a candycane n' lollipops beat Melanie Martinez producers made, an' the chick Melanie heard it an' was like "Nah...this wack y'all" an' threw it out. Then Yeat was diggin' in garbage cans, found that slop, an' put it up in here. Word!
Yeat's vocals got jus' mashed in this beat, so son's jus' inaudible. This track's stupid, b. Why, why, why was this made? This junk's a terrible mixin' job, heck no.
Beats - 0/10
Lyrics - 3/10 (I googled the lyrics an' they be kinda aimless)
3/20
On1 -
Again, I kinda vibes wit' this beat. Too much off key pianos but it's aight. These lyrics tho'...hella messy. If somebody stoned outta his mind on 'cid an' weed was told please write summa them raps 'bout the glamour life, son's raps would probalby be soundin' like whateva Yeat done cooked up here. That "shrimp on the barbie" line was mad brainless.
Beats - 5/10
Lyrics - 3/10
8/20
Flytroop -
The beat here done gone an' dropped way too quick, an' now we jus' gotta whole buncha sound bangin' 'round in our ears. The beat tho'...it gotta be summa the weakest kinda ish since "Forever Again". Lemme give y'all an idea of it. Shit be soundin' like son got a metronome, an' threw a whole buncha piano, guitars, an' a rudely interruptin' drum kick on it wit'out knowin' 'bout matchin' tempos or ANYTHIN'. Son's lyrics match the beat, yo. The lyrics is talkin' 'bout gettin' high on ecstacy an' shootin' people while high. Ayo, got any more of them songs you's enlightenin' the people wit' b??
Beats - 3/10
Lyrics - 3/10
6/20
Eliminate -
We got shots fired here y'all. This thing's a diss track against anotha rapper named Ian, who I ain't gotten 'round to reviewin' yet, but damn sure will, word.
This thing gotta be one of the worst diss tracks since that masochistic white flage Drake AKA Champagne Floppy went an' threw up in Heart Part 6. Check this out y'all. We got Yeat whinin' all ova the track, an' the beat is messy trash as usual. If I was Ian, an' anotha MC came at me wit' THIS track, I ain't know what I'd be doin', but I know for sure, I'mma be laughin' all the way to the bank, WORD!
Son really got on his PG tip here or sumthin', cause the worst insult here at Ian is Yeat yellin' "Bitch!". We got summa them kiddy puns in here, I guess hopin' the opp's gonna die of cringe or sumthin' when he plays the record. Son sayin' that when he shoots Ian it'll be "A hole in one, now we putt-putt golf". How threatenin'. Ian gotta be shakin' in them boots.
Y'all know I'm kiddin'.
Beats - 4/10
Lyrics - 3/10
7/20
Lyin' 5 Fun -
Ayo, I talk a whole lotta smack 'bout fools, n' suckas, n' soy drinkin' estrogen enhanced wannabe rappers here y'all. Y'all know that, fam. But I ain't hatin'. So I'm keepin' it 100 wit' y'all when I say Yeat's voice soundin' mad wack. Kid soundin' like he's chokin' to death on his own vomit. Son's that bad. I AIN'T NEVA heard a voice like this befo' an' NEVA hope to again. This thing's jus' plain terrible, fam. This sum sloppily made track, wit' a lotta weak rhymes ova a kinda decent beat.
Beats - 5/10
Lyrics - 2/10
7/20
New High ft. Don Toliver -
The intro's aight I guess. Summa these lyrics though got them major eye rolls comin' on ya boy. Check this one out yo: "I was tryna tell you I never miss, like free throw". That's gonna be the lame bar I select, cause I ain't gonna be pastin' whole-ass song up in here. Toliver's verse soundin' like son got too high off smokin' perfume n' rose petals n' now he's somewhere dreamin' 'bout being a Barbie boy inna Barbie World. Or sum typa ish like that.
Wack plastic dolls aside, this verse soundin' like they got Toliver bangin' on chandeliers over his voice.
Beats - 2/10
Lyrics - 4/10
6/20
So What -
The intro here is dumb an' the beat sounds like the same dang thin' as every other dang song. Ya boy gonna be losin' summa them overpowered braincells that I gots to summa this moaning, poor rhyming, autotune, an' chaotic beats. We got this "Yeah, comin' through in this big body Tonka, you supposed to move" bar which is FRICKIN' DUMB for the reason I told y'all 'bout the OTHA TIMES son gone an' comparin' his whips to Tonka toy trucks.
Beats - 4/10
Lyrics - 4/10
8/20
Lyfestyle ft. Lil Durk -
Yeat's again talkin' about all the money an' girls he gets. Durk comes through wit' a verse that shows some effort an' is kinda servicible. Sadly to say it is probably the best verse on this whole album.
Beats - 5/10
Lyrics - 6/10
11/20
God Talking Shhhh -
This thing soundin' like the same dang beat as offa "Lyfestyle". We got the stupid line "Make the money twerk like a motherfuckin' dancer". Ayo, whatchu talkin' 'bout son?! That line mad STUPID, on me!! I kinda get what son's tryna say an' all, but yo, the whole thing jus' misses me, word. Son's best darts are these kinda rigamaroles:
"I don't feel a way, I cut them off easy
Yeah, I take that slice, an' take that shit cheesy"
This whole album's been takin' shit straight cheesy, b.
Beats - 5/10
Lyrics - 3/10
8/10
Lyfeparty -
This got the exact same beat almost!! The only change might be an extra static sample or an extra synth. Geesh! Yet ANOTHER Tonka similie. AYO YEAT!! GET YASELF OVA HERE!
Lemme talk to ya son - I'm sick of hearin' about Tonka, Tonka, Tonka. We get it. You's a toy son! Ain't no need for you to say it AGAIN. Oh you is gonna say it AGAIN? Ayo, thanks a lot Yeat. Not.
Beats - 5/10
Lyrics - 2/10
7/20
Fate -
We finally ova wit' this one. The concept's kinda interestin', summa that ish son was on in 2093, but really son jus' raps in Nyquil-ese so I ain't feelin' it none. On me, son's lyrics lack adjectives an' words over two syllables, plus Yeat's voice kinda makes me think son's bored wit' rap an' don't really give a kitty 'bout what he's talkin' about. Son rambled 'bout some mess, I ain't know what all it was, maybe an apology for being so dang mid. I'm out.
Beats - 4/10
Lyrics - 3/10
7/20
This joint's a struggle to get through, shit hurt my ears, b. Let's tally it up:
181/440
41%
One thing I gotta say is Yeat's MAD CONSISTENT. Son's gotta be one of the most consistent rappers this year, fam. Every tape son done put out has been straight snoozefests on wax, no question.
This one of them disappointin', kinda straight up painful records. Tape's a bore. This got me feelin' like I done gone n' been on a long hike thru' a yarn 'bout the life of some rich, spoiled, bratty druggies, who fuck, smoke, shoot, an' flex all danged day. Afta the guy had written up that mumble rap space opera, I kinda hoped son was gonna improve his mixin' an' rappin' an' maybe bless us wit' the same kinda theme. But nope. He done gone an' made this senseless record witta buncha lil' boy mess n' mad wack mixin'.
I'mma critique somethin' kinda important here y'all. This mixin's straight up terrible in places, b. The beats son's DJ put 'im down wit', well they be some Slim Jim beats.
If y'all don't be knowin' what this king be meanin' to say by that, I'mma school y'all, aight? We got ya Slim Jim meat stick thingies right? In them Slim Jims they throws in pork, n' chicken', n' beef, an' they wrap it all up in a whole buncha soy n' corn syrup they kinda smashed togetha. Ya can eat the thing, but it's still a buncha mashed up junk food, nahmean? An' these beats, they summa that Slim Jim beat typa mess. We got synths n' drums, n' cymbals, n' samples, n' a whole buncha staticky kinda mess all thrown in n' cobbled an' smashed togetha to make what Yeat be thinkin's sum typa good beat. These ain't good beats. Y'all wanna know good beats? You gots a heckuva lotta options. I'mma just throw one out I personally vibes wit'. This one's called "Demolition Pumpkin Squeeze Muzick" by Dj Qbert, one-half of the masterminds behind the mad dope "Dr. Octagon" album (the otha one's Kutmasta Kurt, don't sleep on him fam) Check it out here y'all:
Link to sum REAL DOPE ISH, ear bleach for y'all spinnin' Yeat: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CKI5UxYnEbU
An' wit' that, I'mma say peace n' check myself out. This Yeat mess gonna be a skip for me, word.
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