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Bones - Software Update 2.0: REVIEW

Ayo, ayo, what the heck's up y'all?! This ya boy Denzel Curry comin' fresh outta the presses witta dope new album review. We got this fresh tape from this kid calling hisself "Bones" that jus' dropped today. Now I don't quite know what kinda style this kid got, but I'm mad interested, so we gonna check this ish out n' give it it's flowers if it deserves 'em, word. Aight, let's jump in!


Firewall - We startin' off witta cassette tape sound. Kinda remindin' me of old vids from the 2000s of computer viruses on Youtube. I like this instrumental. It's dope. Son usin' a few too many vocal effects for my taste, but he flowin' aight, this workin' out as an intro.

Beats - 7/10

Lyrics - 6/10

13/20

Fork in the Road - This track got a dope beat too. Son's cooled off on the vocal effects too, an' he lowkey spittin'. This track aight, not anythin' I'mma be comin' back to, but son ain't wack so far.

Beats - 7/10

Lyrics - 6/10

13/20

TwentyThirteen - This thing soundin' a bit too much like Yeat. This track not reachin' the same level as the others, shit kinda be feelin' halfhearted, like son had a dope idea he got, but kinda failin' to fully put his soul into it. That gonna be the problem wit' this track right here b, no heart. You got nice rhymes n' bars, but they ain't got no force to 'em. Word.

Beats - 6/10

Lyrics - 6/10

12/20

AccessDenied - I like the sample startin' out here, kinda sounds like son's producer sampled Kraftwerks or sumthin' dope like that. The rhyme scheme here kinda falls apart in the middle of the track, but son soundin' a helluva lot more alive than on "TwentyThirteen". He still doin' that vocal effect reverb or whateva the heck he got done on his voice, but this aight.

Beats - 8/10

Lyrics - 6/10

14/20

ElmoAndTheAmazingTechnicolorDreamcoat - This one gotta be my favourite song title of the year y'all. Jus' look at that thing right there fam. Ayo, what the heck, what in the Bruno Mars is this y'all? Nah, we ain't signed up for no guitar solos here, this ain't even really matchin' wit the rest of the album. Nah, this ain't it son. Coulda put a jazz inspired track or sumthin' here, b.

Beats - 0/10

Lyrics - 5/10

5/20

CCTV - This track dope. Son's flow on the outro hard, an' I kinda wish this thing went longer. He had me gettin' into this an' then jus' quit n' moved on. That's gonna be one of the issues I gots to bitch 'bout here - a buncha this stuff way too short y'all.

Beats - 8/10

Lyrics - 6/10

14/20

CPU - This thing kinda soundin' like electronic piano inspired horror film soundtrack music. Son's chantin' out lines like he at a Gregorian Chant service or sumthin'. Now we got the tempo cahnged so son's voice soundin' squeaky. The mixin' here coulda been a heckuva lot betta, cause there a whole buncha artifacts on son's voice still. Kinda filler.

Beats - 6/10

Lyrics - 6/10

12/20

DropTopFilledWithRain - This one kinda soundin' like Kendrick Lamar's track "Dodger Blue". Same quibbles I got wit' Dodger Blue applyin' here. This thing too soft, it got nice bars but that beat n' flow gonna have me fallin' asleep in my chair. Heck, I got metal flowers comin' out my speakers already, word. Verse Two's aight tho', son was spittin' aight there. That hook tho'...that hook not it, it jus' don't match wit' the rest of the track. Son ain't a great singer, shoulda sampled someone for this one, b.

Beats - 6/10

Lyrics - 6/10

12/20

Bluetooth - Son's makin' that error he makin' on TwentyThirteen where he soundin' like Yeat. An' now he MUMBLIN'?! I KNOW you can do BETTA than that son! Nah, this ain't it, especially wit' all them weird vocal effects on the end. Skip.

Beats - 6/10

Lyrics - 5/10

11/20

ColdConversationsOnBurnerPhones - This one startin' out nice. It kinda goin' noplace tho'. Son jus' spat a couple bars of the type 14 year olds might think were deep, n' nuthin' else. This thing's filler y'all.

Beats - 6/10

Lyrics - 5/10

11/20

101Grams - There was a chance to jus' go off here, but son took the Yeat route. Like what the heck son, you coulda been makin' mountains move wit' this ya know? Y'all coulda been spittin' hard bars, this beat aight, y'all coulda given us anotha Shook Ones Part 2 or sumthin' on this shit. Nope, ya had to go cosplay Yeat. Skip.

Beats - 7/10

Lyrics - 5/10

12/20

CubicZirconia - Aight, this outro anotha Yeat imitation. Why son?? Why?? He even had this corny ass bar he had to throw in - "I bust the top, I'm callin' ZZ". Son, why ya lettin' us down like this? Ya startin' off mad dope, then you jus' go an' start tryna sound like that busta Yeat who ain't spit like you in a dang long time n' kinda seems too lazy to eva do it again. Dang son, y'all lettin' us down bad, namsayin'??

Beats - 5/10

Lyrics - 5/10

10/20


Let's tally this up:

139/240

56%


Aight, this tape gotta lotta flava - the flava of disappointment. Son started out mad dope n' interestin', like I was thinkin' this was gonna be one of them tapes I put on when I was in the mood for summa that off the wall typa stuff. Son was scratchin' the surface of bein' Kool Keith for a sec there, tho' he ain't got the passion for that. But then son came on playin' guitar n' soundin' like Yeat, so all them ideas jus' flown straight outta the window.

This tape a good example of why rappers, both famous n' upcomin' lil' kids in they momma's basement shouldn't be tryna sound like ANY otha rapper. Ya gets a pass if ya doin' sumthin' like all them "Children's Story" tributes but don't make that ya whole dang style. Word, that shit's bitin', an' it's wack, b.

Aight. Final verdict y'all - half this tape dope, an' the otha half endin' in frustration plus disappointment. Word, ya need to quit soundin' like Yeat, ya coulda taken that kid to school ya own self, son!! Aight, I'mma quit yappin' for now n' leave y'all wit' that. Denzel out, peace y'all!

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