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Ayo, Drake n' Party Jus' Dropped the "$ome $exy $ongs" For You Tracklist

Ayo, what the hell's up y'all?! Ya boy Denzel been hangin' out makin' some new albums n' fightin' international crime, n' killin' ninjas an' rescuin' cute blondes n' shit. The borin' mundane typa shit, ya feel me??

Anyhow y'all, disregardin' Kanye AKA Fuckouttaherekanye, Fuckiswrongwithyoukanye AKA IthinkImafuckingGAWDkanye strippin' his wifey in public, then rantin' on Twitter, n' divorcin' her ass, all in eleven days (hey, who the fuck says a brotha can't do a speed run???) we gonna talk 'boutta notha kid who been makin' some waves. Y'all know who I be talkin' 'bout, our boy Malibu's Most Wanted, Flake hisself - sorry, Drake, hisself. An' some cat called PartyNextDoor. Seriously, who the hell be pickin' names for these rappers nowadays? Summa these names soundin' like Fortnite screen names, like I got Discord kids who be gettin' harder names than these, word. This shit mad corny, fix up ya lives y'all.



In case y'all ain't heard, the Aubster and Party gonna drop an album tonight, so y'all probs gonna be readin' this while listenin' to the album. Or NOT listenin' to it. Anyhow, the tracklist n' the subjects of the songs done dropped, so we gonna give that a quick glance over here for y'all, then we gonna be doin' a formal review once the shit drops:


“CN Tower” - Drake analyses the size of his ego, n' comes pretty close, word.


“Moth Balls” - Song 'bout the old hoodie son's grandma lent him - y'all know the one, it had all them holes in it from bugs or sumthin'


“$omething About You” - One of them classic songs 'bout the ladies. Bites lines from the Nigerian who be messaging chicks on Instagram.


“Crying in Chanel” - This joint 'bout what Drake was doin' durin' the 2025 Superbowl Halftime show.


“$pider-Man $uperman” - Drake and Party playin' dressup - a skit.


“Deeper” - Only gonna be remindin' me 'bout what Kendrick said "Rabbit hole goes deeper..." Hm.


“$mall Town Fame” - The Aubster croonin' 'bout how he's the baddest ever to come from his tiny town of Toronto (Pop. 2,800,000)


“Pimmie’s Dilemma” - This track 'bout Drake n' Party tryna figure out why the hell they be soundin' so soft.


“Brian Steele” - Kinda interestin' track, son says "They tried to say I'm soft, but I'm hard like Brian Steele, owwwwwwwwwww....." Barz.....barz......


“Gimme A Hug” - Drake reflects on how he felt after UMG binned "Da Boy's" lawsuit.


“Raining in Houston” - Drake rappin' bout how he felt after the OTHER lawsuit against Spotify got thrown out.


“Lasers” - A cut 'bout how he plannin' to fix his male pattern baldness.


“Meet Your Padre” - Somethin' 90% of homie's children don't be doin' too often.


“Nokia” - Samples a whole buncha dialup modem tones, jus' cause that shit FUNKY!!! Also the only relationship son ever rapped 'bout that actually lasted.


“Die Trying” - What he did while dissin' Kendrick.


“$omebody Loves Me” - This one must bout his moms.


“Celibacy” - Drake raps from the viewpoint of his fans.


“OMW” - This shit gotta stand for "Overly Missin' Women" or sumthin' like that.


“Glorious” - Song 'bout Drake lookin' in the mirror every morning.


“When He’s Gone” - Drake tryna steal Whitney from Kenny. Or maybe Riri from Rocky. Whateva.


“Greedy” - Probably gonna be another Kendrick diss - look at that lil' sucka clutchin' all them Grammys, word.


Like I said, we're gonna be doin' a full review of this thing when it drops. I'mma be expectin' some bars like:

"You dumb if you performing diss tracks at the Super Bowl for the nation
Not dissing, just saying I'm pop, but not a short Compton sensation

That's not anyone specific, that's just a general recommendation

Y'all kids be doubtin' Aubery, like I ain't bigger than inflation, awwwwwwwwww"


And probably gonna also be:


"Knew you were the one girl, you look natural in that position. MmmmmHmmmmm

I like it when you buy a new dress, that's a new invention, awwwwwwwww
You looking good waking up with your hair too messy to mention

That's the way I like it mayne, you always real, not fiction, MmmmmmHmmmm 

But you left me and, mayyyyyyne, my heart's needing pain prevention

I'm still scrolling through your Tiktok and IG hoping for a mention".


Aight, that's gonna be it for tonight y'all. Gonna be droppin' the full review tomorrow y'all, n' until then - peace, an' one love!

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